I Don't Drink

[Verse 1] F# I screwed up, I just wanna say I'm sorry It's all my fault, you should probably ignore me D#m Oh my God, should've given you a warning All my friends are sick and tired of this story F# I don't drink 'cause when I'm drunk, I'm annoying Call your phone when it's three in the morning D#m Start a fight, parked a whip in your garden You probably think I am mentally retarded F# Please, don't call me crazy 'cause I'm not Last night I had one too many shots D# Blacked out, got arrested by the cops Woke up on the neighbours front lawn [Pre-Chorus] F# Every time that I'm hangover, I convince myself I'm dying B Where the hell my pants go and why is my girlfriend crying? F# I say that I remember what I did, but I am lying B There's a tattoo on my buttcheek, it's a beer can and he's smiling Chorus F# I'm pretty sure the last night went down in history B We made it out alive, and that's a victory D#m Black eyes, minor injuries B We lost a fight together, that's a win to me F# I don't drink 'cause when I'm drunk, I'm retarded B Ask around, I'm the life of the party D#m Hold my beer 'cause I'm only getting started B Who cares about tomorrow and the misery? [Verse 2] F# I'm a mess, and I know you don't deserve it You're the best, and I'm a pretty stupid person D#m None-the-less you try to help me 'cause I'm hurting I confess, sometimes I feel like I'm not worth it F# I don't drink 'cause when I'm drunk, I'm a problem I don't care who I hurt, I feel awesome D#m Holy crap, it's either jail or a coffin Soon enough I'mma be at rock bottom F# Please help, tell me, how I end up here? Last night, I had one too many beers D#m Flashbacks, but I can't remember clear Why I texted all my exes, and we haven't spoke in years [Pre-Chorus] F# Every time that I'm hangover, last night doesn't feel so funny B I threw up on my front step, and I wasted all of my money F# I got naked in the night club right in front of all my buddies B Then I went home with some girl I thought was hot, but she is ugly Chorus F# I'm pretty sure the last night went down in history B We made it out alive, and that's a victory D#m Black eyes, minor injuries B We lost a fight together, that's a win to me F# I don't drink 'cause when I'm drunk, I'm retarded B Ask around, I'm the life of the party D#m Hold my beer 'cause I'm only getting started B Who cares about tomorrow and the misery? Bridge F# You call my phone, 'kay be quiet, can you hear it? I don't hear it F# Damn, oh no, my sexy photos, can we clear it? We need to clear it Chorus F# I'm pretty sure the last night went down in history B We made it out alive, and that's a victory D#m Black eyes, minor injuries B We lost a fight together, that's a win to me F# I don't drink 'cause when I'm drunk, I'm retarded B Ask around, I'm the life of the party D#m Hold my beer 'cause I'm only getting started B Who cares about tomorrow and the misery?